Katy Perry's religious parents are unsurprisingly upset about "I Kissed a Girl" and her mother released the following statement to prove that she is, in fact, a closed-minded idiot:
I hate the song. It clearly promotes homosexuality and its message is shameful and disgusting. Katy knows how I feel. We are a very outspoken family and she knows how disappointed her father and I are. I can’t even listen to that song. The first time I heard it I was in total shock. When it comes on the radio I bow my head and pray … Katy is our daughter and we love her but we strongly disagree with how she is conducting herself at the moment. We cannot cut her out of our lives as she is our child but she knows we disagree strongly with what she is doing and the message she is promoting regarding homosexuality which the Bible clearly states is a sin. But the Bible also promotes understanding and forgiveness, which I keep reminding myself. Katy is not a homosexual but I fear she has been led astray by the Hollywood crowd. I pray all the time that God will work through her and help her find salvation.
Katy's response was simply that she "stopped trying to change them at 21," which is probably the best thing she could possibly say. I, however, can say anything I want to, including that the idea that pop songs cause homosexuality makes me giggle with pleasure. Sometimes I sincerely wish that all the things the crazy folk claim "encourage" homosexuality really did. Do you know how easy life would be?
me: hey, you're cute. want to come home with me?
cute straight girl: no thanks, I'm straight.
me: really? Because have you heard this new pop song? *plays song*
cute formerly straight girl: Wow, that's a really good song. I guess I'll come home with you after all.
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