There's No Way Kim Zolciak is 31.

I almost never hear anything about Kim Zolciak, which is a shame, because she makes me feel incredibly good about myself. The woman above is a mere two years older than I am. I would have pegged her at two years older than my mother. I think she's the only famous person out there who manages to look a decade older than she is. And with those slippers, she looks like she might be adding curlers and a walker to her already grandmotherly look any moment now.

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Lesbian Housewife

Well, Tracy had an interview with The Advocate and apparently she can't really say what her relationship was or is with Kim. I think if you have half a brain and read between the lines, it's obvious they had a fling but it didn't go beyond that. But then again what do I know, they could be shagging each other as we speak. It's too bad this didn't turn into something of more interest but maybe there's still hope.
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Kim Zolciak Joins Our Team.

 

Photo from Us by Dario Cantatore

Kim Zolciak was a star of Real Housewives of Atlanta, but now she's a lesbian instead. She broke up with someone called "Big Poppa" who I refuse to google so that I can maintain my hilarious ideas of what someone called Big Poppa would look like. She released a song called "Tardy for the Party" which I refuse to look up because I love my ears. DJ Tracy Young remixed the song and for the last three months they've been an item. Us is reporting:

Tracy broke up with her longtime girlfriend to be with Kim. Since they've been together, Tracy lost a lot of weight and got really skinny for Kim. They seem to be beyond happy with each other.

I don't know anything about any of these people (obviously), but apparently Zolciak is 31. She looks a good ten years older. Maybe more. I don't usually look to TV to make myself feel better about the way I look, but maybe it's time to start.

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