Courtenay Semel is Straight Now. Which Means She Still Shags Famous Chicks, Right?

Courtenay Semel started blogging on her myspace recently, which isn't really newsworthy. But after insisting she dated Tila Tiquila and Casey Johnson (and maybe Lindsay Lohan) I was surprised to read that she defines her orientation as "straight." But hey, maybe I'm straight, too. I just close my eyes and pretend all these girls are really big, beefy men. *shudder*

Thanks to Tolle for being awesome and making my job easier.

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Courtenay Semel And The Beautiful Art That is a Sex Tape

In more of her E! interview, Courtenay Semel discusses the sex tape she made with Casey Johnson which she and Casey then used to blackmail their parents when they needed cash. Now that is classy stuff. She describes it as beautiful, as art. Oh, and as a chance to make some quick cash like her friends have (no joke, she actually said that.) The sex tape is apparently in the Johnson family's possession, so we won't be seeing it ever. But, hey, at least they tried.
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Courtenay Semel Says Goodbye and Hates Tila Tequila as Much as the Rest of Us

Courtenay Semel, who dated both Tila Tequila and Casey Johnson as well as Lindsay Lohan, taped her goodbye to Casey for E! where she said "I will never, I don't think, be with anyone else." (Start countdown to Courtenay's next relation ship in five, four, three...) Courtenay at least seems somewhat sincere when compared to Casey's supposed fiance, so I think I'll lay off on the insults. But, I have to say, it's hard to lay off. Just watch the video and imagine all my sarcastic remarks.
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Tila Goes Hetero

So I guess Tila and Courtenay are over. I wonder if Tila's bisexuality is over, too? Page six says that she was spotted making out with Justin Long in Vegas.

JUSTIN Long is in a downward spiral when it comes to women. After Drew Barrymore broke up with him, Long took up with Kirsten Dunst, maintaining an on-again, off-again relationship for months with the "Marie Antoinette" star. But on Halloween, the "Mac Guy" hooked up with trampy bisexual Tila Tequila in Las Vegas. Spies said the two were spotted at Los Angeles airport and nightclub Noir, where Long "asked her to straddle him while making out. Eww," our spy sniffed. A rep for Long didn't get back to us.

OK, now I'm going to do something you'll never see me do again. Ever. I'm going to write something that doesn't bash Tila Tequila. Keep in mind, this is only for the purposes of queer politics and is not to be confused with my accepting Tila in any way, shape or form. Now:

Why "trampy bisexual"? I mean, yes, she's trampy, yes, she's bi, but there are plenty of trampy hets out there who aren't given that tag. It makes me wonder - if Tila wasn't (pretending) to be bi, would they have bothered to call her a tramp at all? She'd still be one, of course, but would they use the words? I hate that the bi girl is automatically assumed to be a slut. Even if it is true in this case. Not all bi girls act like Tila. I'm sure if you gave me a few days I could come up with at least one who doesn't. Maybe.*

*kidding, don't get your panties in a knot.

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Courtenay Semel Arrested

More old news - hey I'm catching up. Courtenay Semel went out without Tila and lost a little control. The girl got drunk and violent after she lost her cell phone and then got arrested.

COURTENAY Semel, the wild-child lesbian daughter of former Yahoo chief Terry Semel, went on a tear Tuesday night in Las Vegas and ended up spending the night in jail. Semel showed up in the party town without new girlfriend Tila Tequila and started the night at Sushi Samba in the Palazzo with Kourtney Kardashian. “They were filming their dinner for ‘Keeping Up With the Kardashians’ ” our spy said. Later, Kardashian called it a night and Semel went out to Pure at Caesars with Vegas showman Jeff Beacher - and proceeded to “go nuts,” a spy said. “Courtenay got so drunk she was falling down. Security asked her to leave, but she refused.” Semel finally left, but on her way out there was an altercation with a security guard. “She was arrested and spent the night in jail,” a Semel pal confirmed. “And she lost her phone.

Such class!
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Lindsay and Sam Still Doing Stuff

So Lindsay and Sam still seem to be going strong. A rather different looking Sam spent some quality time with Lindsay and both of their mothers in New York. They're still being seen all over together, not doing much of anything interesting other than remaining a not-so-secret couple.

Recently, Lindsay decided to convert to Judaism after talking to Sam about the religion. Her father is still an idiot and still giving his opinion, of course.

As long as she believes in God...She’s exploring right now. She’s explored the Church of Scientology, she tried Kabbalah, and now this. I think it’s just another phase. But either way, she’s involving God in her life, and I’m happy about that.

Lindsay's friends say she just can't be queer due to her overwhelming love of men's attention. In OK Magazine we hear:

Apparently LiLo has already been flirting with guys, and cracks seem to be appearing in the relationship. On August 5 at the Delano Hotel’s Florida Room, Lindsay, 22, cozied up to other men whenever Sam left her side.
“Lindsay was laughing and giggling with these guys,” an eyewitness tells OK!. “Lindsay is the aggressive one in the relationship,” an insider tells OK!. “Sam tries to focus on Lindsay, but it’s never enough.” Another friend adds, “Lindsay has to be the center of attention, or she’ll flirt with other guys to make Sam jealous.”

Lindsay’s friend says, “She’ll be with the next guy who catches her eye — she can’t help it!”

But other friends insist that she's really very queer indeed to News of the World, talking about her relationship with Courtenay Semel. Some key quotes from "friends":

Everyone thinks Samantha is Lindsay’s first lesbian love, but we were very passionate until her fear of being found out drove us apart. At the time she was terrified her career would be over if she revealed her sexual tendencies. But then Samantha came on to the scene and I was dropped.

She met Lindsay in the summer of 2006 at a party in Malibu. From the start Lindsay was very confused about her feelings for Courtenay so did more and more drugs to stifle the sexual attraction she was experiencing. But eventually she just gave in and at every party they’d kiss and touch each other in the corner. It’s a miracle nobody found out. Both of them would do lines of cocaine in the toilets then head home and fall into bed together.

Back then Samantha and Lindsay didn’t have a physical relationship. She once said, ‘Samantha’s the father I never had’! Apparently Samantha acted in a ‘paternal’ way towards her, giving her advice and cuddles.

Courtenay still can’t understand how Lindsay is now so open with Samantha. Every time she sees a picture of them together it kills her.

So here's a cute picture of Lindsay and Sam out shopping in LA. just because they look cute and happy.


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Tila and Courtenay Still "Together"

Tila and Courtenay are still showing up at events acting like a couple. Know when I'll believe this one is real? Me neither. They could get married and I'd say it was a publicity stunt. They could be "together" for a year, an eternity in Hollywood, and I'd insist they were just friends and using the whole thing so that Tila could pick up future men. I might believe that Courtenay is actually queer, though. You can be both queer and an attention whore.
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Tila Still Trying to Make Us Remember Who She Is

So apparently Tila Tequila has a new girlfriend. And really, it's not for publicity or anything. Uh huh. Sure. Tila and Courtenay Semel talked to People about thier new supposed romance:

A beaming Tequila told PEOPLE she “didn’t want to jinx anything” about their relationship, but said she was very happy.

Semel, however, happily shared her feelings for the MTV reality star. “I’d seen the show [A Shot at Love] and just needed to meet her…and it just happened,” Semel says of Tequila. Now the “best friends” are content to lay in bed watching movies, share clothes and makeup and steer clear of drama.

“There are no games,” says Tequila. “It’s true what they say about lesbians–you meet and then the next day you move in together, because I can’t get rid of her. She pretty much lives at my house.”

I believe that they lie around in bed watching movies. I just don't believe the whole lesbian part of things. I mean, "best friends"? Who describes their new lover that way?
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